


Dating Catwoman

by thegirlwiththemouseyhair



Category: Downton Abbey
Genre: Alternate Universe - Science Fiction, Alternate Universe - Superheroes/Superpowers, M/M, Weird Fluff, Weirdness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-15
Updated: 2014-07-15
Packaged: 2018-02-08 22:39:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,178
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1958760
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thegirlwiththemouseyhair/pseuds/thegirlwiththemouseyhair
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is a futuristic AU where most everyone has super powers, and Thomas is a bit of a double agent on the super power-enhanced police force. Also, same sex marriage is legal and there’s little to no homophobia in this future - but Thomas and Philip are star crossed anyway...</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dating Catwoman

**Author's Note:**

  * For [daredevilmoon](https://archiveofourown.org/users/daredevilmoon/gifts).



> Yes, the strange super power futuristic AU, titled after the trope on TVTropes. Philip here is a gentleman thief a la Raffles; his superpowers are seeing through most solid objects, telekinesis and being able to tell an object’s history by picking it up. Thomas’s powers are manipulating time and space, and Daisy has similar powers to Philip. (Carson’s super power is just being stodgy. Had to have something canon related, didn't I?) Ten points to whoever spots the Velvet Goldmine reference and another ten to whoever spots the Stardust reference. Basically, this is one of those fics that makes me wonder “What the actual f*$#?” But dedicated to my friend ALittleWhosThis because I think she's awesome and taught me the ways of the Crowbarrow (and is also awesome for other reasons).

“Given your status, Your Grace, you may choose the Inspector who will search you…”

Chief Inspector Carson fumbled his words. It couldn’t be easy for a stodgy, traditional type like himself to have to detain a member of the old aristocracy. Thomas suppressed a smirk. Carson would hate it if he laughed. Besides, Inspector Thomas Barrow’s relations with His Grace the Duke of Crowborough were less than professional. It wouldn’t do to invite questions from Thomas’s superiors.

So Thomas kept his face frozen in a mask of calm, even when Philip’s eyes met his and reminded him of all they’d shared last summer during Thomas’s leave from his post with the Downton City Sensory Enhanced Police Force.

But of course Philip wouldn’t leave him be. Philip _would_ call in a favour just now.

“He’ll do very nicely,” Philip said, grandly, as he gestured in Thomas’s direction. “Inspector… Barrow, is it?”

He took one step closer. Carson raised his baton.

“Search him, Inspector,” Carson said to Thomas.

“Very well,” Thomas answered. “You’ve already been read your rights, Your Grace, so…”

Philip scarcely looked at him - but they’d look at one another soon, in private.

“Yes, and I have the right to a private search under the Convention,” Philip said. “So you’re to take me inside, Inspector. And I must say, I’ve half a mind to sue the whole Force for libel. These gentleman thief rumours must stop…”

Thomas had expected no less. He was rather proud of Philip, and bit his lip to keep from grinning.

“Just step right this way, sir,” he said.

Philip followed Thomas into the station. Thomas felt his face warming, and hoped no one around would notice his blush. Philip was just so damn attractive when he acted this haughty - almost as attractive as when he was tender or vulnerable or teasing. And Thomas had seen it all.

He sighed in relief when they entered the private search room, with its Sensory-proofed curtains. It wouldn’t do to have dodgy types like Philip or even officers like Inspector Robinson-Mason who had the Sight being able to see through the station’s private rooms.

“How’ve you been?” Thomas began, turning to Philip at last.

Philip beamed at him.

“Quite well,” he replied. “But I’ve missed your letters. You _do_ take an awfully long time to read and write back.”

Thomas shook his head and pretended to pout.

“Well, I’ve been busy. I don’t live the life of leisure you do, you know.”

Philip sighed. “Some life of leisure. I’ve been summoning diamonds just to keep my rooms at the club, and you see where that’s landed me. Anyway, isn’t your magical power manipulating time?”

It was. Thomas had the knack with time and space from his dad.

“It’s not the same,” Thomas explained. “I can’t really enjoy it, when I’ve manufactured the time. And your letters are worth enjoying.”

He adjusted the curtain, then leaned closer in for a quick kiss. Philip nipped at Thomas’s bottom lip, playful and seductive.

Thomas laughed.

“When’re you gonna steal something big enough for us to run away together?” he asked. “You promise. And you know I’m here to help you.”

“I’m working on it,” Philip said, with a roll of his eyes. “Or I could just marry an heiress - or an heir, for that matter, and you’re not one.”

Thomas pretended to glare at him. “Yeah, well, I have it on good authority that your heart and other parts of your anatomy are preoccupied with me instead. I’ve got the letters spirited away where even you can’t find them.”

“I doubt that very much,” Philip countered. “But I am working on the heist of the century, and eloping to New Switzerland and all that. I even picked you up something. Here.”

He reached into a pocket, and pulled out an assortment of diamond pieces. Finally he found what he seemed to be looking for - a green glass flower - and offered it to Thomas.

“What is it?” Thomas asked.

“ _That_ belonged to Oscar Wilde,” Philip explained. “He lost it at Oxford in the year 2873, on the same day he won the Hampstead Prize for poetry. It’s passed through a number of hands, and now I would like you to have it.”

Thomas took the trinket and studied it.

“Thanks,” he said. It was touching, really; he was a little lost for words as he hid the green glass in his jacket pocket. Then he cleared his throat. “You’ll still owe me a favour, though. And don’t be so pig-headed - I’m here to help with that grand scheme you’re working on.”

“I know that,” Philip replied. “Look, just get the diamonds back somewhere I can find them again, all right? So I can pay my rent. And tell your Chief Inspector that I’ll be suing the whole Force for harassing me.”

“Right, and I won’t mention that you haven’t a brass farthing to your name for the legal fees,” Thomas teased.

Philip kissed him again. “I will in a few minutes.”

“All right.”

Thomas took the stolen diamonds from Philip. He closed his eyes, concentrating hard on the diamonds and the alley behind the quaint little pub just blocks from the station.

“There,” he said. The diamonds disappeared from the palm of his hand. “They’ll be behind the Grantham Arms in ten minutes, under the rubbish bin.”

Philip wrinkled his nose. “Literal diamonds in the rough?”

“Hey, be grateful I’m helping you,” Thomas said. But he put his hand on Philip’s shoulder. They fell into a close embrace.

They did make _such_ a good team.

“I’ll see you later,” Philip promised. “Really.”

“Damn right you will,” Thomas said. Then he forced the mask back onto his face and pulled the curtain open.

“Officer Stuart?” he called.

The young woman looked up from her desk. She’d be easy to fool. Thomas could not even imagine what they’d engaged her for; she had no particular talents that he could see. No wonder she hadn’t advanced past paper pusher.

“Yes, Inspector?” Ivy asked.

“Make a note in the file that His Grace the Duke of Crowborough had nothing suspicious on him,” Thomas said. He made a point not to look in Philip’s direction. “Nothing whatsoever. Now, I’m going to authorize his release myself, then speak to Chief Inspector Carson. I believe in upholding property law as much as anyone, but we can’t keep harassing so important a person.” He paused, forcing himself to smile at young Ivy. “Don’t write all that in your report, though. Just the first part.”

“Yes, Inspector,” Ivy said. She looked at Philip for a moment with wide eyes. “You’re free to go, Your Grace - the rest’s just a formality.”

“Thank you,” Philip said, stepping out from behind Thomas. Thomas saw Ivy’s cheeks redden before he turned back to face Philip and nod at him.

“And thank you, Inspector, for your help.”

This time, there was no keeping the grin off Thomas’s face. He’d have a good laugh tonight over the double entendre and the promise of more to come. 


End file.
